As father’s day approaches, I have to reflect for me on what it means for me to be a Dad. As I mentioned in my first Manly Monday post, my father has made a huge influence on me….especially as I have gotten older. I find myself becoming more and more like him as the days go on. This is not always a bad thing, but there are some traits that can be troublesome at times.
When J-Mom and I got married, I think I always knew I wanted to be a father, but she and I decided to wait for a while before having Diva-J (6 years to be exact). When we did finally decide to try and get pregnant, it took longer than we had first expected, but happened none-the-less.
Diva’J’s birth was a bit of a drawn out drama, with after about 17 hours of labor, we ended up having to have an emergency C-Section. Everyone came out of it ok, just very tired. Well…needless to say when I had to dress in my scrubs and go into the room where the C-Section would occur and I saw J-Mom there, I was just filled with so many emotions…fear, anticipation, excitement, etc. etc. etc.
Now an emergency C-section does not take that long, especially after 17 hours of labor, so I did my duty and comforted J-Mom as best I could and waited to be able to meet our baby (as we did not know the sex until Diva-J was born). When finally Diva-J made her appearance, the doctor said to me ” what do you think we have here?” Well to be honest I had to take a second to look, as a newborn is a bit wrinkled up and finally she said “it’s a girl”, making sure I noticed the right anatomy parts (Which I did)..and there she was, and our life changed in a new and wondrous way.
I look at my life now and realize that there is now never a day when I don’t think about how my actions will impact not only my wife, but now my girls as well. I think about how I want things to be (which is not always possible – at least not now), and what I might be able to do to be able to accomplish these goals. I definitely have fears and issues in being a father, but what father doesn’t.
Just the other day I talked to a friend who learned recently that he was going o be a father in December. I asked him how he was feeling about this, was he excited or scared? Now, his reaction I think would be the reaction of man out there, he stated he was scared. I think it is a scary thought to consider the magnitude of being a father and how important fathers are to the upbringing of their child/children. I did my best to comfort and support my friend, but know that he will have to do whatever he has to do overall to be able to be the best father he can be.
There are many fathers out there who cannot say that there fathers were role models to emulate. I can honestly say that my father is one I would choose to emulate in many ways. I also have a father-in-law who shows me now how important fathers can be, so I am truly a lucky Dad.
So what about all of you Dads out there? What does it mean to be a Dad? Also, if you are really ambitious, go over to Discovering Dad to see his recent post and contest he is running, or even over to Joeprah for some fun and possible contest winnings as well!