Dad of Divas

One Dad's Quest to Regain Control of his Kingdom

9-11 – Honoring the past. Where were you 22 years ago?

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9-11

9-11 – Honoring the past. Where were you 22 years ago?

I think that most of us can all remember the moments that surrounded the 9-11 tragedy that struck our nation 18 years ago.
I remember where I was… I was in my office at the university that I was working at as a Student Affairs Professional. I believe it was J-Mom who called me and told me to turn on the radio because it looked like a plane had collided with one of the twin towers. Unbeknownst to us was all the malice that was behind the first attack, let alone the subsequent attacks within New York City as well as the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania.
I remember hearing this and calling my colleagues to find a television that we could turn on and we watched in our main office as the tragedy revealed itself. I was numb, dumbstruck. Only once before had I felt this way, and that was when the Space Shuttle Challenger exploded. I simply had never witnessed such hatred, such a loss of life, and later that week we found out how close to home this hit our family.
The Saturday before 9/11  my wife and I celebrated the wedding of a high school friend of J-Mom. The wedding was a wonderful event full of love and laughter. At that event, I was able to meet a friend of the bride named Kelly Ann Booms who sat in front of us during the wedding. She made a comment that she had to get back to Boston on Sunday because she had a business trip that she had to fly out for (to Los Angeles) early on Tuesday morning (9/11). Later that week we found out that Kelly was a passenger on the first plane that hit Tower 1 (Flight 11). We were shocked that someone we just spoke with could be gone in an instant and it brought the national tragedy to a whole new level of meaning. We now felt a part of this tragedy and not as far removed.
The images of the first few hours of 9-11, and the first few days afterward still are burned into my memory and I think they will never leave. For my generation, I think that this event will be the event that truly defines our generation as it may have been Pearl Harbor for my grandparents or the JFK assassination of JFK for my own parents.
So today, 22 years later I take a moment to remember Kelly and the other victims of the 9/11 attacks. May we never again live through such an event.

When my daughters get old enough to understand the significance of this day I will help them understand, but it will not be easy for them to grasp the severity of the events and what it did to the American Spirit that followed. I can only hope that I will be ready for this discussion when the time comes.

So my question for the day?

 

    • What are your memories of this event in our collective history?

 

    • How will you tell your children about this event in the future?

How Dads Can Bond With Their Children

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man carrying child
Photo by Caroline Hernandez on Unsplash

Every family is different, that’s what makes them so special. But they all have one thing in common, parents should always try to have a close bond with their children. It doesn’t matter whether you have biological children, step-children, adopted children, or foster children, it’s up to you to make that connection.

Parent-child bonding is beneficial to everyone involved, but especially your kids. Your children need to feel safe and loved to thrive. Growing up isn’t easy, and in some ways, it’s even more difficult than it used to be. 

Your children need to know that you’ll be there for them, and the only way they can know that is if you prove it.

Give Them Time

Yes, you’re busy. Everyone is busy. But people give their time to the things that matter most to you. Think about how you spend the hours of your day and what that proves to your children and your family.

Most parents spend a lot of their time at work, which is a necessary part of providing for your family. But do your children understand where you are and what you’re doing? Do they still feel like a priority in your life, or are they always put aside because Daddy has to work or Daddy is tired from work?

If you’re short on time and energy, make sure that you get quality, one-on-one time with your children. Make a schedule for your day and, as well as work and the other necessary things in life, schedule in time with your child every day. Even if it’s just half an hour of dedicated time, it’s far better than nothing.

As well as this daily slot of time, make sure that you spend weekends and free time with your children. Yes, it’s important to have time for yourself so you don’t burn out, but try to make sure that they are still prioritized. 

After all, time is precious. Children don’t stay children forever.

Have Fun With Your Kids

So, what to do with all this time? Well, that’s up to you and your family. After all, every family is different.

But the important thing is to try to have fun with your kids. Introduce them to your hobbies and be willing to get involved in the things they love. This can mean curling up on the sofa and watching the best police movies, playing their favorite video games, or going for walks and playing sports. 

Plan these fun times with your children, so they look forward to spending time with you.

Parental Responsibility

While having fun with your kids is, well, fun and valuable for building relationships, it isn’t the only responsibility you have as a parent. 

One of the most important things a parent can do for their child is discipline them. Discipline doesn’t just mean to punish your kids when they’re misbehaving. The word actually means to teach or train your children.

Teaching can involve punishment, but most of the time, teaching is something else. You need to teach your children how to be responsible and how to be successful adults. You shouldn’t only discipline your children when you’re angry with them, as this can lead to lashing out. 

How Dads Can Connect with Foster Children

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Dad and Daughter

Connecting with foster children is essential to making them feel safe and starting to enjoy your life together. If you are a working dad, you might worry about how to connect if you are out working a lot of the time, and the bulk of the day-to-day parenting falls to your partner. But it doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are some tips to help dads connect with their foster children.

Learn as Much as You Can

Agencies like orangegrovefostercare.co.uk have plenty of useful resources, but reading articles, getting tips and advice, and taking part in foster care training will help you be prepared for anything. This can increase your confidence as a foster carer and bring down some of the walls you might have put up. Being prepared and learning as much as possible will make it easier to bond and connect, whether you are a stay-at-home parent or going out to work.

Be Patient

You are unlikely to feel an instant bond with a child in your care. It will take them time to settle, and they’ll need to be comfortable before they open up to you. The process will be different with every child you care for. Be patient, don’t try to force a connection, and don’t worry if sometimes it takes longer than others.

Prepare for Bumps in the Road

Your journey with a child in your care will rarely be a straight line. Some days you might feel like you’ve got a strong bond and enjoy each other’s company. Some days it will feel like they’ve put walls up, and you’ve taken a step backwards. Reassure yourself that these bumps are normal, and they will pass.

Take on Responsibilities

If you go out to work, your partner will have many of the parenting responsibilities. But taking on as many as you can, and sharing important things like meetings and appointments, will let your foster child know that you are part of the team, have their best interests at heart, and will be there for them. Some responsibilities you could take on include bedtime, reading, and bath time.

Teach Life Skills

Teaching life skills is a fantastic way to spend time together and add something useful to their time with you. Things like baking, DIY, swimming, and for younger children, smaller skills like tying shoelaces can be skills that they’ll always associate with you.

Enjoy Some Fun Dad Time

Remember, not everything has to be a learning activity. Family time is great, but if you can, spending a little time one-on-one and having things just for the two of you can help you build a strong connection. Kicking a ball in the park on Sunday mornings or riding a bike are good ideas.

Start a Project

A project is a fantastic way to bond, spend time together, teach skills, create memories, and really connect in a fun way. Projects could include growing vegetables, building a birdhouse, or creating a scrapbook.

Talk About Feelings

Don’t be scared to tell them how you feel about them or talk about your general feelings. Show them that it’s ok to be emotional.

Connecting with a foster child can be tricky and take time, but you’ll start feeling fantastic when you do.

Getting the Graduation Party Invitations Ready!

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Grad Party Invitations

It is so hard for me to believe that my oldest is graduating high school this year. In only a few weeks I will be watching her walk across the graduation stage and probably shedding a tear or so as well.

As we prepare for the graduation ceremony, we also are preparing for her graduation party too. She has been very involved in the planning, and she has some great ideas about the look and feel that she wants this also came down to the type of graduation card that she wanted too.

We looked online for a while looking for a site that offered us a ton of grad cards that would help us get the word out about her graduation party. Basic Invite is a site that I came across that was simply amazing. Not only did it have a ton of graduation party invitations 2023, but it also had cards for other life events as well. For me, looking for items for graduation, I was also happy to see that they offered thank you cards, announcements, and more.

Basic Invite is one of the few websites that allows customers almost unlimited color options with instant previews online. Once you select a design, you can change the color of each element on the card. With over 180 colors, you can make sure the card is exactly how you want it. This sets this company apart from what I have seen in other online stationery companies.

Grad Party Invitations

Beyond all of the colors you can choose from, Basic Invite also offers you something I have not seen elsewhere: you can order a printed sample of your invitation before you place your final order. This allows you to check out the paper quality and how it will print in real life before you buy a ton to send out to all of your friends!

On top of all of the options you have in customizing the items, you can also customize the envelopes that they come with. Basic Invite has over 40 different envelope colors to choose from. With so many options, you can easily make your envelope match the invitation. Also, all of Basic Invite’s envelopes are peel and seal so the envelopes can be closed quickly and securely.

Finally, Basic Invite offers an address-capturing service that allows you the ability to share a link on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or any other social media to request your friends and family’s addresses. The addresses are then stored in your account and can be selected during the design process. Basic Invite offers recipient address printing at no cost on all card orders.

Best of all, right now, Basic Invite is offering 15% off with coupon code: 15FF51

 

Follow Basic Invite on all of their Social Media Platforms:

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Pinterest

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Why Short Breaks Can Be Easier For Kids Than Long Journeys And How To Plan For Every Eventuality

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For some parents, thinking about a flight abroad with their kids is enough to make them feel stressed. Very young children can be unpredictable during travel, and the longer the travel time, the more potential there is for temper tantrums, and need for constant supervision and entertainment.

With some careful planning your holiday has more scope to go smoothly and turn out into a brilliant new experience for everyone. Let’s explore why some types of holidays aren’t suitable for young children, and which ones are better for the younger members of the family.

Long Journeys Can Be Tough On Kids

Very few enjoy long haul flights, they can be uncomfortable, and although some flights may have numerous movies and tv show options on their in-flight entertainment system, they can get boring. Especially when you are travelling 8 hours or more and get tired of staring at a screen. Young children may have a particularly difficult time coping with a longer journey and could start getting frustrated in a setting that is both unfamiliar and with minimal stimulation.

Children have shorter attention spans than adults, which is why long journeys can be particularly arduous. Bringing along toys and games can help keep them occupied for a while, but they can eventually get tired of this strategy. Although some parents have an easier time, and manage to get through flights with little incidence, there is no way to know how a young child could react to a long flight. If you want to avoid stressing out yourself, your child, and your fellow passengers, it may be worth considering a trip with a shorter journey time.

Shorter Journeys Are More Manageable

Shorter journeys will be easier for children, although they may still fuss over a situation where they are stationary. The shorter duration means that their attention may be taken by toys, games or tv for the full duration of the flight. Timing is also important, for some booking the journey over your child’s usual naptime slot could mean that they sleep through the trip. However, this might not be a good idea if your child doesn’t like being woken up when they are feeling tired. In this case, choose an earlyish daytime flight.

Keeping Your Kids Safe

Children usually love to play and explore new surroundings, so a holiday could be a thrilling experience for a child. In the midst of the excitement, children could injure themselves, and depending on the severity of the injury, a visit to the hospital could be expensive.

You can protect yourself against a financial set back by buying travel insurance ahead of time. Providers like Staysure offer coverage for medical expenses and cover lost or stolen cash and baggage.

Think Of Kid-Friendly Activities

You might have some ideas for what you want to do during the trip, however your kids will have very different interests and will also need entertainment. For example, young children are less likely to appreciate a detailed historical tour or a visit to a vineyard. It’s important to include them in the trip by gearing some activities towards them. A good option could be a theme or water park, a visit to the beach, or perhaps something else that they will find engaging.

Often, you’ll find that hotels offer child-minding services where you can leave your kids for an evening. There they’ll get to play with other kids and participate in a number of different games and activities while you get some time to yourself.

Conclusion

Taking kids on a long flight or travel journey is never going to go smoothly all the time. If you’re taking your children on holiday, your life will be a lot easier if you head for somewhere closer to home like France or Spain. When you arrive at your destination, keep an eye on your kids as they play and explore, and partake in new activities, while enjoying the break for yourself.

How to Help Your Children Make Healthy Choices for Themselves

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Making healthy choices is important both for adults and children. But how do little ones and teenagers know what is good for them? It’s up to the parents to help and guide them. So here are five tips from Dad of Divas to promote healthy habits in your kids.

 

Take Them Grocery Shopping

Encourage your kids to eat healthier by taking them to the supermarket and having them pick fresh produce for the coming week’s menu. Teach them the importance of eating a variety of colorful fruits and vegetables in order to get all the vitamins and nutrients their growing bodies need. Letting your children help you plan healthy meals will make them more likely to eat what’s on their plates. And while shopping for other foodstuffs, encourage them to read labels and make smart decisions regarding sugar, sodium, and fat content.

 

Sign Them Up for Team Sports

Besides the obvious health benefits of playing sports, like improved cardiovascular health, muscular strength, endurance, and flexibility, just to name a few, being part of a team is an excellent way for children to learn good sportsmanship, and how to be gracious whether you win or lose. Playing a team sport like football teaches about working together and respecting your coaches, your teammates, and your opponents. And it’s also a great way to help them develop a spirit of competition and of cooperation, two skills that will serve them well when they reach adulthood.

You can work together to stay physically fit and ready for competitions by working out as a family, too. Do something you all enjoy, whether it’s throwing a football in the yard, taking the kayak out, or simply walking around the neighborhood after dinner, or even walking to dinner for a treat on some evenings. Being active together and showing kids how to take advantage of walkable neighborhoods can make a big difference in their interest in and ability to remain active throughout their lives.

 

Turn Off Your Electronics

Sleep is very important for kids, both for their growing bodies and for their brains. So help your children have better nights by making them turn off all their electronic devices at least one hour before bedtime, and stick to a regular routine that will signal the brain that the body is ready to get some rest. And during the day, try to limit your kids’ screen time by providing healthier alternatives like outdoor play, board games, or arts and crafts to stimulate their creativity. Getting off their phones and electronics will help them become more active and engaged.

 

Talk About Your Goals Together

Teach your kids how to articulate their bigger goals, and encourage them to share these goals together. You can model this practice by showing your kids that hard work pays off. If you’re dissatisfied with your job or you want to further your career, consider pursuing an online degree in IT technology. You’ll not only increase your earning potential, but you’ll also become a leader in your field. Studying online gives you the flexibility to spend time with your family while earning a master’s degree, and your children will benefit from seeing you going after your dreams.

When your kids see you pushing for a better life – and one you’ll enjoy more – they will be likely to do the same. As parents, we want our kids to succeed and push them towards setting educational and career goals, which is great. Just be careful about pushing kids into one tract or preventing them from changing their minds. Help them to see what steps are necessary for getting into a great college or becoming successful in a career field that interests them, but let them guide the process. And don’t get mad if they make changes. Let them know that change is normal, and that you will help support them through these big decisions.

Modeling ambition for your kids can be a powerful, positive thing, and one of the best ways to do that is by pursuing a nursing degree online. An online nursing program can give you the knowledge and experience you need for an exciting career in healthcare – and demonstrate to your children that it’s never too late to learn something new. With an online program, you’ll have the flexibility to study at your own pace, allowing you to manage both work and family commitments.

 

Volunteer

Turn your children into lifelong givers and philanthropists by letting them volunteer for causes they’re passionate about. Take them to the animal shelter and sign up for shifts petting cats waiting to be adopted, scooping litter boxes, or taking adoptable dogs out on walks. Volunteer at a soup kitchen together and listen to other people’s stories and experiences while you bond as a family.

 

Be a Role Model

Raising children isn’t an easy job, but it can be extremely rewarding when you see your little ones grow into wonderful human beings. As parents, you are their first teachers, so make sure you model good habits for them. Make being active and eating healthy fun and creative activities. And remember to be their biggest cheerleaders as you support them in their goals, both big and small. But most of all, enjoy life with your healthy, happy kids!

Parents and Carers: Tips for Keeping Your Personal Data Secure

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Mom and ChildIt is very easy to agree without thinking, to companies storing or sharing your preferences and other personal information. A few searches on Google and you click ‘Allow all’ or Accept’ without missing a beat.

But if you stopped and thought for a moment, just how many companies have your personal data? And what data exactly? According to a Statista survey, only 12.5% of respondents weren’t concerned about the storing of their personal data. Yet, an overwhelmingly high number of people has not started removing their personal information from the internet, which is something the most people should do.

Examples of PII (Personal Identifiable Information) that data brokers can store about you include:

  • Name, age, gender, race
  • Past and current addresses
  • Financial and health information
  • Sexual orientation
  • National Insurance/Social Security number
  • Passwords/email addresses/phone numbers
  • Internet browsing history

What is a data broker?

Data brokers are businesses that find and collect information on individuals from a number of sources – for example, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, public and electoral records. Their aim is to process the information to ensure it is worth licensing and then sell it publicly to other organizations.

 

How can this be avoided?

Think about some of the ways you put your PII (Personal Identifiable Information) and that of your family, online:

  • Google
  • Email accounts
  • Social Media
  • Blogs
  • Online Shopping sites
  • Shopping loyalty schemes

Read on for some tips on how to keep your information as private as possible.

1.    Remove personal information from Google

Every time you type a search topic into Google or submit any personal information to buy products or services, your data is being collected and stored.

You can request that information is removed, but Google can refuse, as they evaluate requests before deciding whether to agree or not.

2.    Clean up or delete your email accounts/social media accounts

It is unlikely to expect that people will be willing to close down their social media. But paying a bit more attention to what information you are showing to the world will make a massive difference in keeping your personal information, personal.

When you think how many accounts you have created over the years, it’s not a good thought to realize that your personal information could still be stored somewhere.

3.    Use decoy personal information

Unless it’s a situation where you are legally required to use your real information, there is no reason why you can’t set up a different email address and name when signing up to use websites, storing all unwanted communication as spam.

4.    Cancel your shopping loyalty programs

Loyalty programs store your shopping history and sell it on to data brokers. So, if you can bear to forgo the savings, shutting down your accounts will make it easier to keep your personal information secure.

5.    Opt out of Data Broker sites

You can send manual data removal requests to the data brokers that hold your information, or opt out. They are likely to collect it again, so it can become a regular chore. If you don’t want to have to do this manually on a regular basis, you can find automated data removal services that do it for you.

Resources to Help Work-from-Home Parents Maintain Work-Life Balance

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Work from home

Working from home can be a great way for parents to balance career and family. However, managing both a full-time job and child care isn’t always easy. This is especially true for parents of kids with extra needs, such as those with autism. Today, Dad of Divas shares some tips and tools that can help you achieve that ever-elusive work-life balance.

 

Set Up a Career That Accommodates Parenthood

Some jobs are more child-friendly than others.

 

Optimize Your Home for Professional and Personal Purposes

Setting up a comfortable home to accommodate work and parenting is essential.

 

Invest in Technology to Make Your Business Low-Maintenance

These cutting-edge tools can make your day-to-day work life easier.

 

Find Support Where You Can

You don’t have to go it alone. Trust others to help at work and at home.

 

Working from home while raising kids allows you to maintain a career while still spending time with your little ones. However, it presents challenges. Finding your community can help. For example, if you have a child with autism, connect with other parents of autistic kids online. The above guide offers some resources to help things go a little smoother.

 

Dad of Divas is dedicated to chronicling the challenges of being a father as well as providing some food for thought to other dads. Please feel free to click on our posts and leave a reply!

The Types of Braces Every Dad Should Know

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BracesDifferent types of orthodontic treatment plans are used for dental issues such as overcrowding, misalignment and incorrect spacing and to improve both the appearance and functionality of teeth. There are many more options to choose from than what was available a few decades ago, with each option suited for different applications. If your kid needs braces, you should know what is available on the market so you can select the best option for them.

Metal Braces

Metal braces, also known as conventional braces, are perhaps the most recognizable braces that kids, teens, and adults can get. These braces used to be large and bulky, but they have become better and less conspicuous as orthodontic specialists have continued to improve them.

The dentist attaches the braces to the teeth and then connects these braces using a piece of wire. The wire is connected to the braces using elastic ties that are responsible for applying the pressure that pulls and pushes the teeth into position.

The orthodontist also makes adjustments to the braces every month or two to ensure the best results. Metal braces can be a great option for parents who do not want to remind their kids to wear their braces after a meal or brushing. They are also less reliant on patient compliance for the same reason.

Parents have to weigh these advantages over the potential of poor oral health, especially in younger kids who might not have mastered how to take care of their oral health properly yet.

Clear Braces

Clear braces have become very popular in the last decade or so because they are virtually invisible when worn right. Even though they are used by patients who have previously had braces to correct certain issues, they are also very useful for issues like misalignment, large overbites, jaw alignment issues, and open bites. They can also be used in kids who have teeth and jaw alignment issues caused by thumb sucking and pacifier overuse.

Apart from being clear, these braces are different from metal ones in that one can remove them easily to brush their teeth or eat without the aligners getting in the way.

Because of this, they might lead to better oral health than metal braces which can make brushing and flossing much harder. There are additional differences between clear aligners and metal braces, and this guide from ALIGNERCO does a great job of explaining them.

Lingual Braces

Lingual braces are placed behind the teeth to help align and correct tooth position. They are a specialized option which makes them rarer than other brace options. They also require special skills, or you might have to find a dentist who specializes in them if you want them for your kids.

Lingual braces are completely invisible because they are applied behind the teeth, they can be customized to work on specific teeth, and they provide better versatility and efficiency in select patients. Their properties make them well suited to adults who have complex orthodontic needs but want full invisibility, or teens and adolescents who are more conscious about their looks.

One thing you should know is that their position and installation can cause changes to your speech. Developing a lisp and some irritation to the tongue is very common. However, these issues go away once your mouth gets used to the braces.

Self-ligating Braces

These work similarly to metal and ceramic braces, but with one key difference. Whereas elastic bands are used to connect the wire to the braces in traditional metal braces, self-ligating braces use clips or doors to hold them in place.

The two types of self-ligating braces are active and passive braces. Passive braces have a sliding clip mechanism that puts pressure on the arch wire so that it keeps providing tension to move the teeth. A passive brace has a sliding mechanism that does not apply this pressure. These passive options are great for keeping the teeth in place, especially in cases where the patient or orthodontist does not want movement.

These braces lead to much shorter appointment times because they are easy to adjust. They are also a great option for patients who cannot sit for long periods, are sensitive to discomfort caused by other types of braces and have orthodontic needs stemming from developmental delays.

Ceramic Braces

These are made out of a clear material that is made to match the colors of the teeth. They work similarly to metal braces but are less conspicuous and discreet. These braces are a popular option for those considering either metal or clear braces, but who want complete secretion and affordability. For these reasons, ceramic braces are typically requested by adolescents and adults. Although they are less noticeable than metal braces, they are slightly larger and can stain depending on brushing habits and the patient’s diet.

Each of these options works well depending on the age of your kids and their orthodontic needs. Knowing about them should help you pick the best ones for your kids.

Movie Review – Strong Fathers Strong Daughters

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Strong Fathers Strong Daughters

Strong Fathers Strong Daughters

When a wealthy businessman learns of his daughter’s sudden engagement to a missionary, he embarks on a quest to keep her closer to home. But when his efforts go awry, he must reconsider what it means to be a strong father. A heartfelt journey of a parent who is desperately trying to hold on to his children learns to trust in God with their future instead of controlling his daughter’s narrative. The movie explores the widely relatable challenges and joys of parenting and faith.

Both set of couples, respectively playing Steve and Connie (Bart Johnson and Robyn Lively) and Carlos and Bella (David Barrera and Maria Canals–Barrera), are also married in real life. Just like their characters, they are raising children of their own, resulting in an on–screen dynamic that feels authentic and meaningful.


CAST AND CREW
Directed By: David de Vos
Story By: Meg Meeker
Teleplay By: Amy Snow and David de Vos
Produced By: Brady Nasfell
Executive Producer: Michael Scott, David A.R. White, Kendall Baldwin, Jim Ameduri,
Cast: Bart Johnson, Robyn Lively, Carrie Wampler, Brandon Prado, David Barrera, and Maria Canals–
Barrera
SPECS
Run Time: Approx. 94 minutes
Rating: TV–PG

About the Movie
As someone that was a fan of the book with the same name I was excited to watch this movie. While it is not the same as the book I can see the parallels and to be honest I love how Sony Pictures captured the essence of the book through the characters and the plot of the movie. One of the things that I loved in this movie was the journey that the father went on to be a better father. The movie is heartfelt and allows you to  see the power of God in trusting that the future will work out instead of as a father trying to control the fate of your daughter.


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