About The Book
- Marriage does take work-it just doesn’t have to be “dirty” work
- Your communication styles may be different but the heart of the matter is “how are you best heard?” You must know your love language and the language that your spouse speaks for solid communication to work.
- If you are willing to give 150% to making your partner happy and they are willing to do the same for you, your marriage will flourish and grow to the deeper levels of love that most people never experience. The fact is that most people do not even realize that something deeper and more profound can exist!
- Sexual appetites, attitudes and fantasies are interrelated and can lead to a deeper and more profound bond. Sex is not a dirty word and should be openly discussed with a loving heart. Sex is a normal and integral part of healthy and enduring relationships as long as boundaries are respected.
- Trust, communication, being best friends, respect, and acceptance/unconditional love are the keys that create a successful marriage.
- Vulnerability is something that most people are afraid of and (unfortunately) never expose that tenderness to their partners. Only through vulnerability can your grow your love to deeper levels and strengthen your love bond.
- Unconditional love sounds very daunting, if not impossible; however, it is the glue that will hold your relationship together. Unconditional love does not mean tolerance of bad behavior, it means acceptance of your spouse as a human with the knowing that those things that may be upsetting can also be the things that bring you closer.
- Bedroom “Essensuals” are critical to the health and growth of any marriage. There are particular items that every couple should have in their bedroom to stimulate the health and growth of their relationship over the years.
- Date nights may sound silly but a weekly date night is preferred (no less than one date per month) and is critical to the growth of your marriage. If he is not “wooing” his woman and if she not “swooning” over her man, someone else will! The need and desire for love and affection never changes! Date nights are the best way for couples to “play” and enjoy each other.
- Love does not mean sex; although it can! Men are visually stimulated and women are more “emotional”. Neither is right or wrong, it is just a fact of what our chemical composition reveals about our own humanity. Love is something that you do, not something that you have. They key is to accept and delight in the differences and explore and allow the balancing of needs to take place.
- Couples must treat each other better than they treat the people they work with, not worse. While your home should be your safe haven, your attitudes and demeanor toward your partner/spouse may be misdirected toward the one you love the most.
- There are times when there is hurt and pain. A successful marriage does not mean being “stuck” or unhappy. On the contrary, there are ways to enhance the love bond between two people even if there has been trauma in the relationship. If both people are committed to making the relationship work, it will work.
- The most significant aspect of life is love. Marriage is a precious gift that we are so graciously given. Some of us are blessed with longer marriages than others and some of us never have the opportunity to experience such a beautiful expression of love. There is no time like now to enjoy the one you love on the deepest levels of love possible as you continue to grow to new and deeper depths of love.
Lisa Pankau grew up in Texas and Oklahoma, the middle child in a family consisting of three daughters. As a divorcee and a widow, she has experienced life at both ends of the spectrum – from the depths of dread and despair to the untold bliss of true love. A few years after her husband’s death, Lisa retreated to an island home off the coast of Honduras to heal and to reflect on the more important issues of life. She currently works as a developer on the island, simultaneously creating her own dream and helping others make their dreams a reality.
My Take On The Book
|This book looks at relationships beyond lust and stability and tries to help the reader identify how they can stimulate a deep love and understanding of their partner.
The book was an easy read and the author bears much of her own soul to the reader. It helps when talking about these issues to understand what the author brings to the table per se and Ms. Pankau does this, and does it well.
The book provides specific ideas on how couples can increase the intimacy that they may share with their partner and how to help your relationship grow.
I found that the book itself made many references to what a woman can do, but it somewhat failed to reciprocate for what a man can do to assist in the relationship. This is something of a generalization, as there were many parts of the book that in fact were connected to both men and women, but others, specifically in parts that were more practical referred to how she should do something instead of how he can help her.
If this book sounds like one that you would like to add to your own little library, you can find it on Amazon!