Getting your fitness in as you get back into school schedule

August 23, 2019 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Tara Zimliki, founder of Tara’s Bootcamp, is no stranger to finding time for fitness. As a mom of 4 children, she has the art of balancing back to school with her workouts. Below are some of her favorite tips for those looking to maximize their time for fitness:

Growing up, I remember the lazy days of summer which included sleeping in with no real priorities, staying out with family at the beach all day and heading to the boardwalk in the evening. A midday nap to recharge was not uncommon in preparation for an evening out with the family. When my sister and I woke up my parents took us to the boardwalk for hours of arcade games, roller coasters and the evening usually ending with ice cream, yes, life was good. On our day trips out to museums, water parks or family vacations; one or both of my parents were always there to supervise. Naturally, I just assumed this was loads of fun for them, as it was for my sister and I. I mean how could parents not have a blast as the squeals and laughter of children would indicate. But as a mom of 4, I now realize things are not as simple as it seems. Sure, us moms have fun but the summer is also a great deal of work trying to find time for self care activities like fitness. As we head back into the fall schedule with children’s sports activities, managing completion of school work we naturally get back into a routine. And as much as it can be tough managing time, it is somewhat easier having a schedule to follow by. But be sure to include exercise in your back to school schedule. And to get on track to success follow my back to school fitness tips:

1) Early bird gets the 6 pack

The earlier you rise, the more you get accomplished. Get up an hour or two earlier so you can squeeze in your workout before you even get the kids off to school. This is not only a good example to your children but you will also be amazed in how this sets the stage for a more positive and productive day. As a personal trainer for over 14 years, the majority of my dedicated clients exercise in the wee hours of the morning. Why? The best time for no excuses, other then I am tired is in the AM. And the only regret you will ever have is the workout you may have missed. So make sure to not hit that snooze button and get out of bed sleepy head!

2) Exercise after the kids head off

If you find the mere thought of exercising at the crack of dawn to be daunting, find the best time that works best for you. Some prefer exercising after the kids head off to school. If you have time to do so before heading to work, go for it. But be sure to make this a tip top priority so you stay on track to your goals. When scheduling your kids activities be sure to schedule your workouts.

3) Workout during the kids activities

Instead of standing on the sidelines while your child practices soccer, go for a run or walk around the park. Do not be a bench warmer, warm up your body with a super sweaty session. In just 45 minutes to an hour several days a week you can get in better shape while feeling world’s better. Who knows?! You may even begin a fitness trend that all the other team parents adopt also.

4) Midday workout can transform you

Break out of your afternoon slump, and awake your senses with a workout. As your children are back in school you may find the free time in the afternoon to squeeze in a workout. This will give you a surge of energy to fuel the remainder of the day when the kids get home.

So as the kids head back to school, schedule your routine for regular exercise. Design a plan that works best for you and stick to it. As fall begins, it is time for you to fall back into fitness. I promise you that you will not regret it. And you will have an established routine to help you manage your time best!

About Tara Zimliki

Tara is a Certified Personal Trainer, Boot Camp Instructor and a mother of four. She has competed and trained with top athletes at the University of South Carolina where she was awarded a full cross country scholarship. Tara has a degree and specializes in fat loss and nutrition. She is passionate about helping people change both body and mind, believing positive results stem from positive attitudes. She helps clients maintain this attitude with fun, challenging and rewarding workouts. Tara’s love of fitness started as a child when she began running at the young age of 7. She played numerous sports but running was her passion. Tara enjoyed it so much that she continued running right up until she had children, completing the New York Marathon 8 months pregnant with her 2nd daughter and the New York Marathon 6 months pregnant with her 3rd child and 4th child and even ran 1 mile the day she gave birth to her first daughter and 3 miles the day she gave birth to her second daughter and taught and participated in two bootcamp classes before she went to the hospital to deliver her third healthy and happy child. Tara has completed 36 Marathons and hundreds of races worldwide. In addition, she has won many 5Ks and placed top in many long distance runs. In 2008, Tara placed in the top 500 women for the NYC Marathon. Recently, she won the USATF New Balance Long Distance Grand Prix for women 34 and under for the 5th consecutive year. Tara’s practices what she preaches in all aspects of fitness and health and for this reason she is a trusted trainer that produces results. For more information, please visit

www.tarasbootcamp.com

6 Lessons to Teach Your Daughter Before She Leaves for College

January 10, 2018 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

College is both an exciting and frightening stage for both parents and children. The best thing we can do as a parent during this time is offer our knowledge and insight on how to take on these exciting years to contribute to the already good head on our children’s shoulders.

These are six lessons to teach your daughter before she leaves for college:

Never allow anyone into your life that fails to meet your standards

Develop relationships with people who not only have your best interest in mind but theirs as well. Your social circle should be comprised of individuals that positively influence one another, share your values, and will always be friends you can rely on until the end of time. Don’t waste your time on people who are shallow, unmotivated, and unsure of themselves; their energy and attitudes will only bring you down with them.

Invest time into maintaining your emotional and physical well-being

The most important relationship in this world is the one you have with yourself. Putting time into your emotional and physical well-being is necessary since doing so keeps you grounded and clearheaded, decompresses stress and anxiety levels, and enables you to come back to center with yourself. With that said – love yourself, take more time to be in solitude, and explore all the classes and hobbies that interest you!

Put in the hard work, effort, and sacrifice into the goals you wish to accomplish

You will never get things done unless you take action. In the words of Manoj Arora, “You will either find a way, or an excuse.” Don’t expect to suddenly wake up one day and have everything fall into place. That attitude breeds a sense of entitlement towards success which prevents you from being motivated to take steps forward or accomplish goals wholeheartedly.

Trial and error is important, and should not be feared or resisted

No one is perfect, and trying to meet a standard that doesn’t exist is only a waste of time and energy. Embrace the fact that you will make mistakes, fail, and be disappointed – you’re human. What matters at the end of the day is that you get up back up again instead of criticizing yourself for things that already happened or cannot change. See your mistakes as learning experiences instead of setbacks.

Say “no” to the things that make you uncomfortable

College will open your doors up to new experiences – especially parties, concerts and music festivals. Since attending these events may interest you, please be safe! Say no to drugs such as ecstasy or LSD. They completely warp your sense of reality, thus leaving you in a vulnerable state where you might unintentionally injure yourself or be taken advantage of by another person.

Plan for the future

When you’re young, you feel like you have all the time in the world. However, while you may feel that way – it is imperative for you to be diligent about mapping out a game plan for your future, save money, and have a general idea of where you want to go with your career. You don’t need to have your entire life figured out by any means because no one can predict all that! Instead, focus on what matters most in adulthood: financial and professional security. These things determine the quality of your life for the next few years.

Because college is an incredible time of independence and exploration of one’s interests and abilities, preparing our daughters to take it on is the best gift we could give them. When your little girl finally leaves for college, you can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that she has the six lessons mentioned above to rely on.

Choosing the Right Kind of Razor: A Look at the Options Available

September 25, 2017 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Choosing the Right Kind of Razor: A Look at the Options Available

Choosing the right kind of razor is crucial for ensuring a smooth shaving experience. Most of us start with simple, cheap disposable plastic razors which are widely available. As we grow, we start to prefer razors that will last longer and offer a smoother shaving experience. At this point, we often choose a razor and stick with it without giving much thought to the variety of options available or what the differences between them are. Rather than dedicating the time and money necessary in order to establish which choice of razor is the best, below is a brief guide to the most common types of razor.

Disposable Razors

These are the type that we are all familiar with; the typical cheap, plastic razor which isn’t designed to last. The advantages of the disable razor are their low price and the fact that they generally come in multi packs, meaning that even after disposing of one relatively quickly, they still represent good value as the user effectively gets, on average, ten to twenty times the lifespan of an individual razor from each pack.

They are therefore a great solution for emergencies and travel. Their major drawback is, of course, their quality; they will break easily and the blades will be of a low quality, meaning they will blunt before long. Then again, disposable razors aren’t designed to last so this isn’t really a flaw in the concept.

Electric Razors

Electric razors, as the name suggests, are razors which incorporate a battery powered motor which rotates. Electric razors are designed to be truly portable and usable on the go; they don’t require shaving cream or water (although this is often preferred) and allow users to shave even when in the car or on the move. They therefore make a great addition to an emergency kit. They can be used relatively safely while in the car, if you are late for work for example, however remember to always ensure that you keep your eyes on the road at all times when not stationary.

Cartridge Razors

Cartridge razors are the most popular kind of razor and they are the perfect marriage of price and quality, as well as durability. A cartridge razor consists of two parts; the body and the head / cartridge. The body is built to survive and the cartridges are designed to be replaceable, but they start at a higher quality than a disposable razor would. The interchangeable head on a cartridge razor allows for more customization with razor sharpness, number of blades, etc. As long as it fits the mechanism, it can be used.

Cartridge razors are generally the best option as they offer the advantages of a disposable razor, such as a lower cost because multiple cartridges can be purchased, each of which extends the razor’s life, but are of a higher quality and designed to last. They can also be turned into safety razors easily.

Safety Razors

Safety razors are one of the oldest styles of razor available today. In fact, your parents and grandparents will almost certainly identify a safety razor as being like one from their adolescence.

Safety razors make use of a strip, usually of rubber, that allows only a small piece of the blades beneath to poke through. In doing so the safety razor makes users far less likely to injure themselves; injuries are usually a result of the angle at which the blade makes contact with the skin. Often safety razors are among the best built in terms of durability. This is because they are designed for long-term use, unlike a disposable razor, but do not feature replaceable parts like the cartridge razor does.

If you want to learn more about safety razors, take a quick read of The 6 Best Safety Razors That Provide a Super Close Shave which will help guide you on what to pick.

Straight Razors

Now these really are old school! Straight razors are the ones you see in pirate movies; they almost resemble flick knives, with a straight razor blade which is folded into the handle when not in use. Straight razors are the favorite choice amongst those you might think of as the connoisseurs of the shaving world. While straight razors are the most difficult to use, they are a lot easier than many realize and they do offer a fantastically close shave, one that no other razor type can replicate.

For those who are design conscious, straight razors also look the most striking and some of the handcrafted ones feature handles carved out of fine wood. Consequently, the price of a straight razor varies; a decent mass-produced one, which may still offer a striking design, usually retails for around $40, while the more expensive handcrafted ones will set you back closer to $200.

Choosing the right razor for you depends on your circumstances and, of course, the blades! Cartridge razors will often allow for variations such as ‘safety blades’ which are designed to be less likely to cause the user injury. Others will offer a closer shave and there may some more specialist options but these are rare.

Explaining Difficult Financial Times To Your Child

September 24, 2017 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Explaining Difficult Financial Times To Your Child

By Patty Moore, blogger @WorkMomLife on Twitter!

As a parent, you want to protect your children, so you hide the bad from them. When you find yourself in a bad or stressful situation financial, you may end up lying to them about your finances as well.

Look, everyone faces financial difficulties, and it is also important to protect your child from certain evils in the world. However, failing to properly explain certain issues such as financial woes to your kid could actually hurt their growth. In fact, they could grow up ignorant of personal finance basics.

Instead of keeping them in the dark, you could fill them in on your decisions, obligations, and plans of action when you are working on bills or thinking about your finances. You don’t want to just crush them with a ton of knowledge, but if you do it right, you can make it a decent learning experience.

Below, we will delve a bit deeper into how you can talk to your children and what you should or should not tell them.

What You Need to Say

You may be confused about what to tell your children. Just know that you should be honest with your children, but do not tell them any more than what they need to know. If you tell your child too much, then he or she may worry about money, causing stress and anxiety.

Of course, telling your children about the situation is up to you, but if you decide to tell them, stick to a simple and brief explanation about the situation and how it is going to be handled. For example, you may want to tell your child that you need to save money for the next few months and to do so, communicating this effectively is a big step in the financial learning process

Stay Calm

It can be hard to stay calm, especially in a situation where you know that you are already stressed out. If your child starts to ask a lot of questions, do not yell or become upset. They genuinely are taking an interest in what you are saying, but they may not fully understand. Additionally, calmly explaining a situation to them is a great way to teach them more than just finance; they learn through observation of your demeanor

Help Your Child Understand

Once you have explained to your child what to expect, it is time to help them truly understand it. There are many ways that you can do this, but it often works best if you show them as opposed to just telling them.

What this means is for example, if you only have $50 to spend on groceries at the store, take your child with you. If they are old enough, allow them to do the math when you are picking out groceries. Then, let them see how quickly the money runs out. Of course, do not actually let them just buy anything. You should guide them in a constructional manner. However, let them make the decisions, and once they realize how hard it is, show them how you plan to stretch that $50. Sounds like a fun lesson!

Get Them Involved

You can turn learning about personal finance into an activity, and there are a number of different ways to do this depending on how old they are.

One way is to bring your kid along for the ride when you’re paying bills. This doesn’t sound fun at all, but you could try making it fun for them if they are at an early age. This could help them with their math, and it could serve as bonding time when you are covering the utilities. In fact, if they’re excitable, you could make it feel like they’re responsible for the hot water in the house, just something to get them interested.

If they are a bit older, then you could ramp it up a notch with a more ambitious lesson. If your kid is a teenager, then open up a credit card in his or her name. This may sound risky, but if you do it right, then they won’t be able to spend above a certain limit. Give them some responsibility with the card, and you can see if they fulfill their end of the deal. This would be a great learning exercise for someone heading off to college.

You’re in Control

Remember, you’re in control of the situation, and you can make it work. Talk to your children and do not hide anything from them. You can show them what debt looks like and explain to them how credit cards are not a lifesaver. You want your children to learn the basics of finance now so they do not grow up and overspend or throw themselves into debt within the first few years of life.

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7 Reasons A Loving Marriage Brings Hope and Security To Your Kids

July 14, 2017 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

7 Reasons A Loving Marriage Brings Hope and Security To Your Kids

A loving marriage is a wonderful thing to be part of. When you’re in a loving, supportive marriage, you feel safe and secure, knowing that your partner has your back and is always there for you.

Building a strong marriage takes long term work and commitment, with plenty of open communication, and a good dash of humor and forgiveness thrown in. The results are worth it – you’re building a bond that will last a lifetime.

There’s another positive aspect to a loving marriage, beyond the benefits it brings you and your partner: A loving marriage brings hope and security to your kids.

Coming from a home where a supportive, affectionate marriage is central, is nourishing and helpful for your children. Here are 7 reasons why keeping your marriage strong benefits your children too:

Kids Feel More Secure

A home full of arguments or even the impending stress of a possible break up doesn’t provide security for children. It’s hard for kids to feel safe and secure when their home life is on a rocky ground.

A loving marriage gives kids a secure background and a safe home where they can relax and truly feel at ease. A harmonious home life boosts kids’ self esteem, reduces tension, and can even increase their confidence.

The importance of feeling secure cannot be overstated. By keeping your marriage stable, loving, you’re giving your kids a gift of great value.

Affection Becomes The Norm

Seeing their parents be loving to each other lets kids see that affection is normal and natural. Kids who grow up in a home without a lot of hugs or hand holding are at risk of growing up unsure of their emotions or how best to express them healthily.

Growing up around affectionate parents helps kids grow up into affectionate, loving adults who aren’t afraid to show their love for others. One day in the future, they’ll show that same affection and openness to their own kids, continuing a positive cycle.

They See What A Healthy Relationship Looks Like

One day your kids are going to grow up and get into relationships of their own. They may choose to marry. The relationship they see growing up gives them the idea of what a relationship is, and what it should look like.

Kids who see their parents treating each other with love and respect grow up with the healthy notion that respect and love are the norm in a relationship. They’ll have healthy expectations and, with some encouragement from you, will learn to reject any partner who doesn’t treat them with appropriate love and respect.

Learning That Conflict Can Be Dealt With

Even the most loving marriage experiences a little conflict from time to time. If your marriage is strong and loving overall, the occasional conflict won’t be too frightening for your kids.

Seeing that you and your spouse can disagree but still treat each other kindly models excellent behavior for your kids as they grow. They’ll learn that conflict can be dealt with, and that it’s possible to disagree with someone without lashing out and using cruel words.

They Learn The Importance Of Being Mindful Of Others

Seeing you and your spouse treating each other with consideration is a valuable life lesson for your children. When you’re in a loving marriage you’re kind to each other, and show thoughtfulness towards each other’s needs and feelings.

Teaching your kids to be mindful of others sets them up to become considerate, thoughtful adults who act with integrity and maturity in their relationships, and forge deep and enduring connections as a result.

The Value Of Teamwork Is Highlighted

When your kids see you and your spouse working together to get the chores done, plan a vacation, move home, or overcome an obstacle, they learn about the value of teamwork. And if you involve them in projects so they can work alongside you, that’s even better.

Kids who learn how to share, compromise, and work together, are learning valuable skills that will benefit them not only in relationships, but in work, friendships, community activities and more.

Space To Explore And Grow

Kids who feel secure also feel safe enough to explore who they are and their place in the world around them. They have the security they need to grow into themselves and explore what matters to them, what talents and gifts they have, and what makes them happy.

When you create a safe and secure marriage, you give your kids a beautiful environment in which they have the safety and support they need to develop into teenagers and then into adults with a sense of hope and fun.

A loving marriage is wonderful for you and your partner, and it gives your kids a safe, nurturing life at home.

Author Bio:- Rachel Pace is a relationship expert with years of experience in training and helping couples. She has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships. Her mission is to provide inspiration, support and empowerment to everyone on their journey to a great marriage. She is a featured writer for Marriage.com, a reliable resource to support healthy happy marriages.

Parents! Don’t Let Student Debt Hold Back Your Retirement

April 30, 2017 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Parents! Don’t Let Student Debt Hold Back Your Retirement

It’s no secret to most parents today that college is expensive — or that the cost of the average college degree is only increasing. What may surprise parents, however, is that their children’s student debt can have a major impact on their own financial health — including their credit score and even their ability to retire.

There are many reasons why student debt may push off retirement for parents. The two primary causes are federal student loans that parents may take out in their own names to fund their kids’ college education, known as Parent PLUS loans, and private student loans that parents cosign for their children. This article explores the ways that these loans can impact parents’ financial health — and how you can avoid being caught in this trap.

Parent PLUS Loans

For parents of undergraduate students enrolled at least half-time at eligible schools, the United States Department of Education offers a specific type of loan designed to help close the gap between savings, scholarships, grants and other types of financial aid. Known as Parent PLUS loans, this type of student loan is taken out directly by parents of students. The loans are offered at a fixed interest rate that is typically higher than other types of federal student loans. The fees associated with Parent PLUS loans are also higher than for other federal student loans that are taken out by students.

When parents take out PLUS loans, they are responsible for repaying the loans themselves, which can be a heavy burden for many borrowers as they approach retirement. Many benefits of federal student loans are unavailable for Parent PLUS loans, such as income-based repayment options. Additionally, because the loans are taken out in the parents’ name, the loans cannot be consolidated with the students’ loans, making the parents solely responsible for the loans.

Cosigning Private Student Loans

Instead of taking out Parent PLUS loans, many borrowers instead turn to private student loans. While these loans offer an alternative to the sometimes higher interest rates of Parent PLUS loans, it typically comes with a significant drawback: the requirement of a cosigner.

Private student loans are approved on the basis of creditworthiness. Since most students are relatively young and do not have an established credit history, they will not qualify for a private student loan on their own. A cosigner with a strong credit score — typically a parent, grandparent or close friend or family member — is generally required to become eligible for the loan. The cosigner will become responsible for the loan in the event that the primary borrower does not make the payments or defaults on the loan. The loan is then approved, usually at a lower interest rate based on the cosigner’s credit history.

As cosigners, parents take the substantial risk of assuming their child’s entire student loan debt if he or she cannot make the payments for some reason. This could be due to unemployment, irresponsibility, or even death or disability. Depending on the lender, if a borrower goes into default, the entire amount may even become due at once, putting a parent in a precarious financial position. If a parent cosigns a student loan, she should be aware that she could become liable for the entire amount of the debt. If you are looking to avoid this pitfall, you can look into student loans that don’t require a cosigner for your child.

Avoiding the Burden of Student Loan Debt as a Parent

Student debt can make it difficult to retire on time — and can make it next to impossible to put away enough money for retirement. Making smart choices about student loans can help prevent this from happening to you.
First, avoid taking out Parent PLUS loans unless all other options have been exhausted. Parent PLUS loans have higher interest rates and fees than other types of student loans, and less generous repayment options. If you and your child are considering PLUS loans, a direct PLUS loan taken out in your child’s name may be the better choice.

Second, if your child will need to take out private student loans for college, start planning in advance to build up his or her credit score. Make your child an authorized user on your credit card, or help him take out a small loan to purchase a car or other consumer good. By establishing a good credit history, you may be able to avoid the need for a cosigner. If you are required to cosign a loan, talk to your child about obtaining a cosigner release. Once your child makes a certain number of on-time payments and has a certain income level and credit score, he or she can often have you removed as a cosigner. This will remove the burden of the debt from your shoulders in the event that your child is unable to pay.

Third, consider less expensive college options. A great education does not have to mean going into substantial debt — or compromising your retirement. By working with your child and making smart choices, you can help your child get a degree and still save for your own future.

Drew Cloud started The Student Loan Report when we found it difficult to find student loan news and information in one place. In his free time, you can find Drew playing basketball, reading other blogs, or playing with his Great Dane named Rudy.

Homework Help in a Digital Age

July 2, 2016 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Homework Help in a Digital Age

With the kids getting older and technology becoming more of an integral part of classroom learning, I find that there are fewer paper assignments as it relates to homework. Doing your homework now means hopping onto some tech device, signing into an account and completing the work – which essentially means, mom and dad have no choice but to become technological wizards themselves.

As if trying to remember how to solve math formulas that you haven’t seen in years wasn’t hard enough, now you’ve got to be able to keep up with the changes in technology. I’ll admit, it was a bit of an adjustment for our household, but with a few pointers, we have been able to assist our kids when necessary while also providing them with the tools they need to succeed academically in this digital age. Here’s some suggestions below:

1. Protect Your Devices and Data

This is a step we learned the hard way. While all of our home computers were equipped with the latest antivirus software, we did not think about things like protecting the data stored on the computers. That is until the day that our daughter typed and saved a 5-page report on American history and couldn’t find it the next day! Imagine her anxieties and our surprise when we found that the entire file had been deleted. Luckily, her teacher was willing to give her an extra 2 days to retype the assignment, but there were likely preventative measures we could’ve taken.

Companies like Secure Data Recovery offer one-stop security solutions for residential consumers. From services like antivirus protection to data recovery and other technical support, your data and devices are secure should something go wrong.

2. Set Parental Controls

The internet can be beneficial for research and locating necessary data, but you must be careful. As your children are surfing the web for key information, you have no way of knowing what search results will pop up. To ensure that they aren’t accessing information that is inappropriate it is important to set parental controls on all of your technological devices. This will prevent them from coming across suspicious sites that could either expose them to something inappropriate or release a virus on your computer.

3. Know All Passwords

Every time your child is provided with a new login and password for an educational resource it is a good idea for you to have a copy of those passwords. You don’t know how much time we’ve wasted trying to remember a login (or how many accounts we’ve been locked out of due to failed attempts). There are plenty of password managers that you could consider that will make it easy for you to store all of the account information.

4. Have an Email for All Teachers

Your child’s teachers are going to be your partners in helping you to educate your child throughout the school year. With many school systems moving to technological platforms for students, parents, and teachers, you should have no issue with getting an email contact for each one of your child’s teachers. This way, should your child (or you) have questions about the homework, you can reach out to them easily. This eliminates the need to contact them during office hours, send a note, or schedule a visit which can save time and help your child to get the work done more efficiently.

5. Don’t be Afraid to Ask for Help

Just because your kids think you know everything doesn’t mean you have to somehow know all the answers to their schoolwork. If there is a technological platform you just don’t understand (or homework question), the best thing to do is ask for help. You can email the teacher, talk with a librarian, or even do a quick internet search for how to guides so that you can learn how to utilize it appropriately.

Technology continues to change the modern day classroom and the way our children learn. This will most certainly change the way we as parents help them to learn from home. Hopefully, these tips have given you some ideas on how to make homework time a lot easier with technology. Remember, if you’re really having a hard time with it, talk to someone so that your kids can get the best educational experience possible.

Traveling with Your Kids: Parenting from the Road

June 8, 2016 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

Traveling with Your Kids: Parenting from the Road

Easy Tips and Teachable Moments

As we all know, parenting is a full time job that provides no time to rest on our laurels, even on vacation. We’re almost in the thick of summer, and for your kids that probably means endless hours of freedom—at least until school starts back up again in the fall. Instead of letting your kids waste the summer hours away in front of the television set or computer screen, plan a family road trip that will create beautiful memories you can all cherish for a lifetime. Check out this collection of fun travel activities that will provide great teaching moments for your kids during your journey.

Before You Head Out

Before packing up the car and hitting the open road, make sure you incorporate your children’s thoughts into the planning of the trip. If you already have a destination in mind, make sure they know where it is you’re going and help them do a little bit of research on the place before you depart. Outline what you will do, take a look at it on the map to improve your child’s geographical awareness, and discuss the types of things you will do whilst there. This will help your kids develop a relationship with your destination and make it less foreboding, and more exciting. Need help with destination ideas? This travel resource has some great ideas!

As the day of departure draws closer, organize and pack for each day of your travels. This will help your little one practice their critical thinking and improve organization skills in one fell swoop. Once the suitcases are packed, build a wish list with your little ones. Talk about the opportunities there are to be had in the locale you’re visiting and find out what your kids hope to see or do. Keep it with you during the trip to refer to and have your kids ready for the next activity throughout the entirety of your journey.

If you are renting your house out while you’re away (I often do this for some extra income), have your children help prepare for the guest. Whether said guest is a friend, family member, or someone paying to stay in your home, having your child participate in the preparation aspects will help him or her feel pride and satisfaction even before you head out on your journey.

Extra Tip! I always rent my home when I leave for an extended period of time. If you follow this route, make sure you vet your tenants. For children (and their parents), coming back to a robbed home or trashed house can be a traumatic experience. I use this resource to get extra background information on my renters, but Airbnb and Homeaway also have great insurance policies.

During Your Travels

Keep your kids busy during a long road trip with educational projects. Coloring books help keep boredom at bay, but they also work wonders for creativity, independence, and improve fine motor skills. If your little one is old enough to write, task them with a project: list all the interesting things you see during the road trip. This will help you learn more about things making an impression on your children, and keep them occupied for hours. To go off of this idea, you can take part in a rousing game of “I Spy” —an oldie but goodie. This simply game supports problem solving and critical thinking, and will definitely help them to take in their surroundings.

Extra Tip! Traveling can be especially difficult when your children are young. To ease your travel needs, make sure to prepare all the necessary food and travel supplies beforehand. Instead of stopping on the way for greasy, unhealthy fast food, pack some yummy and nutritious snacks your little ones can chow down on in the car. Check out this resource for some great snack ideas for travelling.

You’ve Reached Your Destination

Once you’ve arrived, take advantage of the teachable moments that come your way. Whether you’re out sightseeing or relaxing at the beach, you can incorporate these fun activities to make for an education and entertaining family vacation.

Inspire your child’s inner Sherlock Holmes with detective games. Give your little one a difficult task and have them try to determine how to solve or complete it on their own. For example, ask your child to find five items made of red, blue, green, yellow, and orange. If you have multiple children, make it a competition to see who can find the most creative item.

Help your little one improve their art skills with designated drawing time during your travels, especially if you’re in a picturesque destination. Bring along paper and colored pencils, and pop a squat whenever you see a vista or beautiful sight. Then, spend the time with your kids taking in the views and sketching a portrait of all you see. This is sure to leave more of an impression than a photo taken on your iPhone will.

If you’re leaving on an extended vacation, teach your child the importance of maintaining relationships by writing weekly letters to friends or family members back at home. In these letters, encourage your child to explain the best things they’ve seen; this will help with retention, personal skills, and inspire better independent thinking.

Extra Tip! If you’ve stayed in an Airbnb or some other sort of rental, teach your children the lesson of gratitude by writing thank you letters to your host. Instruct your little one to write down (or dictate to you) the best parts of their trip. This will come full circle if you are renting out your home, as your children will be able to see things from the point of view of both a host and a guest. Check out this guide for great ‘thank you’ writing tips.

As we get further into summer and your kids frolic in the freedom of summer break, it’s likely that you plan to head out on the open road and check out some new places. To keep your sanity and make sure your kids have a wonderful experience, keep these “parenting on the road” tips in your arsenal.

Author Bio: Hank can eat a whole pizza in one sitting. He is a wacky DIY blogger with a nose for adventure. Check him out on twitter to see what he is tweeting about next. @Homebyhank

How to Stop Being Manipulated

September 15, 2015 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

How to Stop Being Manipulated

by Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC

If you’ve ever been in a relationship with a manipulator, chances are you’ll never forget it. You end up being put into situations you don’t like being in — and feel trapped to resist the situation or consequences. In a sense, we are all manipulated into buying something we don’t want, or being in a situation we don’t like, due to social influence. That’s normal and common. But a psychological manipulator is not normal, and it’s not healthy. Someone else is using you for his or her purpose, and in a very real sense, you are being exploited for his or her needs.

Whether you’re dating a manipulator, working for one, or living with one, you’ll feel the effects in several areas. Most manipulators share common characteristics.

They find your weakness and use it against you.
They know how to seduce you into giving up something meaningful to you in order to serve their needs.
They are repeat offenders. Once they begin using you, they continue until you put a stop to it.

It is important to remember that manipulators are not psychologically healthy individuals. They have emotional issues and you can’t fix them. Breaking the cycle begins with you taking a stance and advocating for yourself. You’ll have to stand up to them and confront them to let them know you mean business.

Here are five tips that can help.

First of all, if you encounter one of these people stay away from this if possible. Trust your gut. If you’ve seen them exploit or use others for their own good, the chances are high they’ll use you, too.
Outsmart the manipulator. Manipulators are hard on your self-esteem and you may begin believing you’re not a good person. This is nonsense and a type of brain-washing. Don’t let them blame you for what goes wrong. Hold them accountable for their behaviors that led to the consequences they don’t like. No one has the right to blame you for unreasonable demands nor do they have a right to always get their own way or demand that you make them happy.
Get comfortable with saying NO. Manipulators look for non-confrontational people. Don’t be that person for them. Confront them when they are being unreasonable. Going along to get along does not work with a manipulator.
Set boundaries, and if they don’t respect them, follow through. Sometimes if the manipulator is at work that means following through with human resources, or if you’re married to the manipulator that may mean going to counseling since it is mandatory for the marriage to survive. Then follow through with what you say. Once manipulators know they can break your boundaries, they will continue to.
Manipulators are bullies. Bullies don’t respect feelings. Keeping notes and a paper trail to press charges on a manipulator in your life may be necessary. Having a counselor to help keep you strong while you’re protecting yourself from further self-esteem damage is life changing.

Manipulators hurt friendships and relationships at school as well as in work place milieu. They can be charming and disarming, but your gut instinct is not easily fooled. If you have a bad feeling about someone, stay away from him or her. If you find yourself having to work or live with one, set firm boundaries and let them know you see them for who they are.

Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC, is a licensed psychotherapist and co-author with Janine J. Sherman, of Start Talking: A Girl’s Guide for You and Your Mom About Health, Sex or Whatever. Read more about the book at www.StartTalkingBook.com and more about Mary Jo Rapini at www.maryjorapini.com.

(Re)Connecting With Your Teen on Spring Break

March 15, 2015 by dadofdivas Leave a Comment

(RE)Connecting with Your Teen
on Spring Break

by Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC

Spring break is here and that means family trips. If you’re like many parents, you’ve been busy with your job, your kids’ activities, your partner and your aging parents. It’s easy to forget that you are raising teens, and taking everyone on a family vacation may be more challenging than you expected. Teens aren’t the easiest to travel

with. They have an attitude over things that may not have concerned them before; they insult under their breath; and often they melt into screaming, slamming doors and tears. It can make living with them trying, but traveling with them can push you over the edge.

Rather than give in to your own stress and anger, it’s better to embrace an attitude of reconnecting with your teen(s). This requires you to be an adult, and not take what they say personally, but rather see the vulnerability inside. You want them to be grateful for all the sacrifices you’ve made, and you have a better chance of seeing their gratitude if you make an adjustment within yourself.

Here are suggestions to help you get closer to your teen on spring break, or any time.

Calm yourself down first. Vacations can be stressful and when you take your stress out on your teen, you will get it back double fold.
Remember you’re the parent. Your child is not your friend. Don’t get drawn into petty arguments with them. There is no worse car trip than being locked inside fighting with your teen.
Respect boundaries. Your teen needs privacy and that need is present on vacations, too. Create a space for them to be alone at times, and don’t guilt them or shame them for needing that.
Talk less, lecture never, and listen always. Kids will tell you so much if you don’t make them feel interrogated.
Kids learn most by watching you, especially how you treat their other parent, strangers and waiters. If you are rude, talk down or are mean, they learn that it’s okay to treat others that way.
Before the trip have expectations listed and make sure each child understands exactly what is expected on the trip. Teens are less anxious when they know what to expect.
Always look for behaviors your kids do right, and tell them how impressed you were. Teens need to know they please you.
The whole family needs to have a set time to unplug on vacation. Decide that prior to the spring break and enforce it with your kids and yourself.
The family that plays together stays together. Lighten up, join your kids in ridiculous laughter and fun. Life without humor would be unbearable.

If spring break is going to be spent at home instead of away, these same suggestions apply. Use the time to reconnect with your teen.

Spring break is an opportunity to take a break with your child, getting to know who they are, and reconnecting with them without the pressures of school activities.

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