Our 404th Dad in the Limelight is Scotty Schrier. I want to thank Scotty for being a part of this series. It has been great getting connected with him and now sharing him with all of you.
1) Tell me about yourself, (as well as how you are in the limelight for my readers knowledge)
My name is Scotty Schrier. I am a stay/work at home dad. I am an author and I also run the site www.DadsWhoChangeDiapers.com where I list changing stations that are dad-accessible. I also blog periodically about my family and being a dad, as well as toy reviews and the like.
2) Tell me about your family
My wife and I met in highschool. We were actually in a play together. We started dating shortly after graduation and 20 years later, we’ve got two young boys, 4 and 2. We both work from home, so we’re all together as a family unit, almost 24 hours a day.
3) What has been the largest challenge you have had in being a father?
It’s a lot of the same challenges most dads have. Balance. I know a lot of dads who have told me they’d love to work from home so they can spend more time with their kids. Which is great. But, working from home, I still have to make sure I unplug and actually interact with my family on a personal and intimate level.
4) What advice would you give to other fathers?
Someone once told me to approach my family with a towel draped over my arm. You know, like the waiters in really snazzy restaurants do. Metaphorically speaking, it allows me to serve my family and keep that in the forefront of my thoughts. It keeps me grounded and keeps me from focusing to much on me. Now, that having been said, I also get ‘me time’ and I make sure my wife has some ‘me time’ when she can unplug and get away from the kids for awhile.
5) Seeing that you (or your position) are in the limelight, how have you come to balance parenthood and outside life? If you are currently not in the limelight per se, please still answer this in regards to how you balance parenthood and outside life.
Being home with the kids non-stop, makes it hard to have an outside life. And for a couple of years, I didn’t have any friends outside of my house. It was fine at first, but soon became maddening. So, I reached out to several groups on facebook and the like and that was fine, but I soon realized I needed to get away and connect with other people. So, I started volunteering at our church more, and now, I am the co-host of our weekly “Family Experience” service where I get to interact with the children and their parents every week. This has led to several very meaningful friendships that I wouldn’t have had otherwise. Again, it’s all about balance. And it’s work…
6) What have you learned from the fathers that you have interacted with?
The more I’ve met the more I realize the ‘bumbling dad’ trope is outdated, outmoded and just plain wrong. Seeing so many different personalities and parenting styles has taught me to step back and evaluate my parenting on a regular basis. While I don’t question my motives in my parenting, because I believe all good parenting is rooted in love. BUT I do question my methods. I’ve learned so many little tricks that help me navigate areas and realize that while some things I did with my first son worked, those same things don’t work at all on my second. Instead of just forging ahead and causing frustration and woe…I step back, take a breath and try a new tact. Or, I go to my dad groups online and ask, “Anyone have a kid that’s done this before? And how did you handle it?”
7) What else would you share regarding your experiences as a father thus far? What have been the most memorable experiences that you have had thus far as a parent?
The most memorable things have been seeing my sons navigate the world. The heartbreak when my oldest fell and needed stitches or when he made a friend at the playground then cried when the boy had to leave. Hearing my youngest son call me “Geggy” because he has trouble with his D’s. The shear and utter joy they get from looking at Christmas lights each year. And that warm feeling you get as a dad when they get scared and need you to protect them. But mostly, it’s those unprompted random times when they just say “Daddy, I love you.” that make every trial and tribulation worth it. Four little words can still rock my world.
If you have any questions for Scotty, please leave a comment here and I will make sure that he gets them so that he may be able to respond!