Dads in the Limelight ( #limelightdads )-Christian Collard ( @bluecollard ) #dadchat

I am a 32 year old father living the simple life in a small farm town outside Boston, Massachusetts. I married my high school sweetheart at the age of 20.  Together we share the responsibility and privilege of raising our three children ages 8, 7, and 4.

I’m a hard working hands-on dad involved in just about everything in their lives. I coach baseball in the spring, soccer in the fall & winter, and I donate my time and talents to nearly every organization that my children are in.  When the kids are (finally) in bed, I am usually found working on developing new projects and running my freelance photography business.

Up until last year, I built and published several successful online businesses. The first was an online travel guide to New England (this was before Hotwire/Orbiz and the rest of them), the second site was more of an industry portfolio that became a popular resource for the print and design industry, and my most recent was an online publication catered to today’s “guy” called ThirtyMag. All three are currently under new ownership. Recently I have taken a more local seat to the limelight by following my true passion, and starting a freelance portrait photography business. While I miss the thrill of putting out a site that can be clicked upon by thousands, I love to create work that brings greater meaning and purpose even if only seen by a few. 

Prior to the kids – I wanted to take over the world. I wanted to make a million bucks, have more followers than Ashton Kusher, and write a best selling book about nothing. The internet and social media were the secret to getting all those things quickly and easily, and I was right on the cusp of the new information age. THEN I saw the two pink lines.

My family is the world to me. The boys are ages seven and eight and as active as a boy can be. They play every sport offered, are active in cub scouts, enjoy creative drawing & writing, and partake in every opportunity to be dirty, dangerous, and inappropriate. In every single one of those activities, I am right there with them.

My daughter is a princess that has made me tear me up more times in her young four years than my whole life as a red sox fan (maybe next year). She’s a dancer, a little smarty pants, and can swing just as hard as her older brothers (with a bat AND her fist).

My wife and I are a story that could have been written by Nicholas Sparks (sorry, second Sparks reference). In high school – I was the bad boy jock with a fast car and she was the trumpet playing straight-A honor student who was ALWAYS home by dinner. Somehow she agreed to let me give her a ride home once and we have balanced one another since.

It’s a life that’s hard to complain about.

Patience for me is a challenge. I don’t understand why children can’t listen when I scream their names from across the house. I don’t know why they can’t just go from diapers to pooping on the potty. I’ll never get why they leave Lego’s where my feet step every… single… night.  But alas, they are kids and I’m supposed to be the adult. That fact is also something I find challenging… being the adult.

Enjoy it. It’s so easy to get upset over spilled milk (literally). It’s so easy to want to take the plate of veggies and throw them in the air. It’s so easy to complain about being tired and getting pee’d on. I constantly remind myself that this phase of life is going by way too fast, so I need to enjoy every minute.  I also suggest taking the time to create “life lessons” out of every mistake, every accident, and every close call. As father’s we have the responsibility to teach our children the things that can’t be taught in school or homework (which by the way I am convinced is made to make parents feel stupid).

Balancing the family life and the spotlight of a career can be tough. The biggest obstacle is TIME. I could be using my days to follow opportunities and promote myself, but instead I sacrifice my own personal time (usually after 8pm) to take care of business. I used to love watching action movies and playing video games – but those were the first activities to go. I’ve learned to make my work enjoyable enough to become my passion. When at all possible, I involve my children in my work and projects. For example, I pay my oldest a couple bucks to come along and help hold my lighting. It also allows him to feel needed and teach him how to earn a buck. I also try and take my family along when location scouting for new projects. These are great opportunities to spend time and explore together.

The first and most important father I ever interacted with was my own. While I may pick up small pointers here and there from the dad-friends, it’s my old man who educated me. My father worked multiple jobs to keep us fed – the hardest working guy I will ever know. He tough me to never pass up an opportunity to make a buck, but always think twice about spending it. I relate that lesson to “opportunity” as well. I take every opportunity to be there for my children and never let a moment pass by that could have meant the world to them.

My life today is all about my kids – not a ton of time for me.  Often times I find myself with the thought that maybe I was meant for more or perhaps that I had children before I was ready.  This is a thought that is immediately lost when I check on the kids after they have fallen asleep at night. Seeing them and knowing that they are completely dependent upon me and that love me more than I will know, makes my own wants seem like drop of water in an ocean of importance.

A recent experience I had in reckless fathering is one that neither I, nor my son will soon forget. My eldest’s eight year birthday just passed.  He had a day filled with presents, cake, cards, well wishes, and ordering off the adult menu from his favorite restaurant. On the way home from dinner, he broke down emotionally. A child’s birthday is only second to Christmas in terms of anticipation. Sometimes no matter what you do, it can’t live up to the hype in their heads (a great thing about being a kid). Knowing I could not let my boy down, I jumped into action and turned down an old dirt road about a mile from our house. I put the brand-spanking new 2013 Chevy Silverado into park and told my big guy to jump in the front because he was going to take us home.  Fortunately he gets his height from me and could not reach the pedals so he simply took the wheel but had an experience he is sure to remember forever. Life is a large package of small experiences. Our job as father’s is to make as many of those experiences enjoyable, educational, and memorable as possible.